Why life is like that?

My eldest sister called me in the office today. She asked me to fetch my niece and nephew to my third sister's place in Subang Jaya. So that my 3rd sis can bring them back hometown.

The reason? She wanted to get the maid to go back to hometown, and get a new maid. Of cos she will send her back to Indonesia, or maybe back to the agent. I'm not sure.

It's pretty sad. After all these years, we never have any problems with our maids. All perform reasonably well. Even the last one, who is just around 20++ years old, she'd done really well too. And my bro-in-law is one who is very "cin-cai"..the anything-will-do kind of guy..never complained about the maid..this time, he complained about this one..

how can one mistook cooking oil for dish detergent?? my sis got a shock when she took one of the cup, and found it so oily..then she checked the detergent, and found out that it was filled with cooking oil..so she summoned (summoned eh..hahaha)the maid, and asked her why the detergent is filled with cooking oil..she said..it's yellowish in color right..so she thought it's the dish detergent..a cooking oil with complete label... *scratching my head* and she have to wash all the dishes again..becos quite a lot of them are oily..and..can't you feel the oilyness after you wash it??? *scratches head again*

this is not the only case though..a lot of other things..she was with the previous maid..for few weeks i think..and she has been with us for like few months now..i'm not sure..maybe 1 month ++ or 2 months..she's still as blur as she's in the first day..

when you talk to her..she will go like.. "ok..ok"..then after that..nothing happens..one good example is one day..my sis wanted to go out..so she asked her to wash the milk bottle that my niece and nephew drank..and it's on the table..and I think my sis went out for quite long...more than 2 hours...and when she came back..the milk bottles were still on the table..can u imagine that...

there are few more blur cases...i experience it too...but i just pity her...so I didn't complain much..

now we're sending her back..I hope my sis is sending her back to the agent..at least she got the chance to get another job.....she is probably in her 40's..coming all the way to Malaysia from a poverty stricken place in Indonesia...hoping to earn more money...and now we have to reject her..i'm really sad for her...i really feel for her..she's not my relative...she's not anyone close to me...but I know she's not from a well to do family...that's why she have to leave her country to come here for a better opportunity...it's really heart breaking..

she just brought some clean clothes to my room..telling me..she will be away for quite some time..i feel like crying when she tells me that..becos i know we are sending her back..(to the agent I hope)...why?

you can argue that we should give her more time..and train her..all i can say is that..we've given her enough time..and my sis couldn't afford to have a maid like that becos she's going to be very very busy once the school starts..becos she just opened a child development center..in subang..it going to take up a lot of her time..and she needs a good maid to help her around the house..and to take care of my nieces and nephew..

it's so sad...you won't know it..unless you experience it..no matter how sad I am..i'm sure she will be even more sad..when she found out the truth..

berat mata memandang, berat lagi bahu yang memikul

I'm helpless..i couldn't do anything..becos I can't even look after myself yet..i feel like giving her some money..but I don't even have enough for myself...and if I do give her money..she will feel weird..and the cats might be out!!!

WHY LIFE IS LIKE THAT?

i'm still wondering..I hope i can find a solution to all these..just like how Siddharta Gotama found the solution to all sufferings in the world...

i know it'll be a tough work..but I hope one day..i'll be able to do what I really wanted to do all these while...I know that I may not be able to help all the poor in the world, but I WILL HELP AS MUCH AS I CAN. those that I can't see, or i didn't know about..of cos I can do nothing about it..but those whom I can see..or i know about..I will definitely so something..

this is the promise that I make to myself..one day..when I'm able..I WILL HELP.

why life is like that?

why can't everyone have equal wealth?

why some have to suffer in poverty, while some enjoy wealth?

why some ppl are born handicap?

are all these becos of karma? I really don't know..maybe it is..but whatever it is..deep down inside my heart..I really feel that no one deserve to be like this..i don't know whether what I feel is right or wrong..but it really sadden me..to see people suffer...especially older ppl...

it breaks my heart too...when i see some granny or grandpa..or shall i call them..senior citizen..cycling around town..looking for old card boards..or collecting aluminuim tins just to earn some money..it really sadden me..they are already so old..and they still have to go through this...

i have visited an old folks home twice in Langkap..with my hometown Buddhist Association...it makes you wonder what kind of heart these ppl have to not care about their parents...and just throw them into an old folks home...i will never know..i will never know what kind of heart they have to do that...becos I really can't imagine myself letting my grandma or parents staying in such place..their rooms are unkempt.as they dislike ppl go in and fiddle with their belongings..the place is dark...it's just sad...why? WHY?

and I know I'll never find the answer to...

WHY LIFE IS LIKE THAT?